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Lies On Ch 28 A Comedy of Errors
Light demonic
reaperlight
A/N: This is a Death Note fanfic. I don't own Death Note.

***

Light was trying really hard to be understanding, he really was, but the man he loved the most had just left him all alone in the dark with nothing but his thoughts and the ringing in his ears, no explanation, no chance to defend himself, and Light feared that in the darkness and the stillness his own racing thoughts were slowly driving him insane. It also gave him no solace to know that his annoyance with the detective was perfectly justified.

The demon shifted slightly within the confines of the small salt circle, keeping his wings protectively wrapped around him like a security blanket. This also hid his nudity from the nameless, faceless gawkers that would occasionally pass by his cell. He was exhausted, desiccated, and ravenous, and his muscles ached and burned from being stuck in the same position for hours at a time.

“Oh no… this is embarrassing.”

In the comfort of the hotel room upstairs L watched Light squirm over the monitors. After a few minutes of hesitation L clicked on the P.A. button.

“What is it, Light-kun?”

“Ryuuzaki! I’m sorry but I’m afraid I don’t know the safe word.”

L stared blankly at the monitor.

When no response was forthcoming Light (to his absolute humiliation) resorted to begging.  “Can you let me out, please Ryuuzaki. I really need to use the restroom.”

L sighed but extracted himself from his typical awkward and incredibly uncomfortable mode of crouching upon his otherwise comfy chair and Watari almost heaved a sigh of relief upon seeing L actually move. The elderly caretaker had been really worried about his lassate ward—how he just crouched there, obviously brooding seeing as he had left his sweet cart completely untouched.
“Mr. Matsuda,” L inquired in his usual bland tone.

“Yes?” The rookie inquired as L shoved a small metal pot into his hands. Matsuda was most puzzled. “What is it?”

“A chamber pot. Take it down to Light-kun, won’t you?”

Why is it always me? The rookie’s shoulders sagged as he made his way down to the hotel’s basement and boiler room. Someone, probably Watari, had cleared out a storage space and installed a steel-barred prison door on the entrance. It was the room L was using as Light’s makeshift prison or rather it was simply the room that held the true prison within. Matsuda found it hard to believe that just that little ring of salt was preventing the younger man from moving but then he doubted that Light would be crouching there for hours willingly.

The detective swallowed a sudden lump in his throat while he unconsciously loosening his black silk tie as he unprofessionally ogled the naked teenager. Matsuda knew he shouldn’t think about the Chief’s son in such a way but Light was still just as alluring at the last time he’d seen him on the examination table. It was so wrong! He’d worked with the Chief for a long time—he had practically seen Light growing up. To Matsuda, Light was still that polite and charming ten year old boy he had first met when he was still in training. He shouldn’t have such feelings for him—even if things had so obviously changed. Light was a young man now, well a young demon, but even with his demonic features on display… the red batwings, the goat-like horns, even the fangs—he had such cute little fangs!

“So cute!” Matsuda blurted and the teen blushed, his serpentine tail swishing behind him like an angry cat’s.

Idiot,” Light hissed under his breath as Matsuda took to babbling excuses.

 “Sorry… Of course you must know you’re incredibly sexy. I mean I’m not gay… but if I was gay I would totally do you. But I’m not gay! I’m not… you’re too damned pretty! And you have a boyfriend and you’re a real good friend and…. So yeah, shutting up now.”

“Snap out of it, Matsuda.” Light sighed and pretended to examine the cuticles of his skin where they met his claws.

 “Matsuda, you idiot. He’s using his pheromones on you—he’s trying to seduce you,” L’s masked voice snapped from over the intercom and Light barely suppressed a growl.

“It’s not like I ask for this kind of attention, you know! I’d turn it off if I could!”

 “My apologies, Light-kun—I suppose it was not fair of me to suggest you wanted this kind of attention,” the intercom buzzed blandly and Matsuda didn’t think L sounded at all sincere in his apology. He was quickly becoming annoyed with the consulting detective on Light’s behalf.

Meanwhile Light turned to regard the young cop who was still standing there, drooling at him, from the other side of the barred door.

“Look, Matsuda, I’m flattered, really, but while Ryuuzaki might be mad at me for some reason he’s still my boyfriend and I doubt he’d appreciate it if I cheated on him on top of whatever it is I allegedly did.”

 “No, by all means, screw Matsuda. I don’t care,” L insisted, his passive-aggressive tone carrying even through the voice filter.

…And so it came to pass that Matsuda had the front row seat when L finally opened up lines of communication with the prisoner again. Surely the world’s greatest detective and Chief Yagami’s son would handle such a dispute with maturity and grace…

“Ryuuzaki, just what the hell is your problem?”

 “Matsuda, tell Light-kun that he knows what he did,” spat the detective.

 “That is completely unfair! How am I supposed to know what the problem is if you don’t tell me?!”

“Matsuda, tell Light-kun I’m not talking to him.”

“Fine! Matsuda, could you please tell Ryuuzaki he’s being a dick?”

“Matsuda tell Light-kun that he is being very childish and it is now 98%...”

“Wait? 98% of what?! What’s going on?”

“Matsuda, please remind Light-kun that I am still not talking to him? I fear he is developing memory problems in his young age.”

Tell him yourself!” Matsuda snapped, about ready to yank his own hair out. The poor rookie was at his wit’s end.

“Uh, Matsuda, could you please hurry it up?” Light pleaded, fidgeting slightly in further embarrassment. He really did have to go.

The teen had been hoping that Matsuda would escort him to the restroom or something. Instead the rookie cop nervously placed a chamber pot within the circle.

“Gee, thanks.” the teen grumbled.

Upon coming to his senses Matsuda couldn’t help but feel a wave of compassion for the prisoner—the detective realized that L had essentially left Light to rot in the dark, confined to that tiny circle and now he felt like a heel—just for following L’s orders in regards to taking care of Light-kun.

“I’ll get Matsuda to change it when you’re done,” L said over the intercom.

 “Gee, thanks” came Matsuda’s echoing sentiment, seeing as he was less than enthusiastic about his newest assignment.

“It couldn’t have killed you to install plumbing, you know,” Light observed.

“There are some who are concerned you might somehow escape through the plumbing with your demon powers.”

Light made a face. “Ew. Even if that was possible… just ew,” Light glared at the chamber pot and then at Matsuda. “Are you really going to stand there and watch me pee?” the teen asked incredulously.

“Are you really going to make me stand here and watch him pee?” Matsuda complained to the security feed, equally aghast.

“Yes,” came L’s blunt reply. The detective scowled at the resulting noises of disgust coming over the comm. “Grow up.”

“Ryuuzaki, you seriously need a hobby. I swear you have some of the weirdest fetishes.”

L glared blankly at the monitor screens but did not dignify that with a response. He still wasn’t really up to talking to the lying, conniving, (damned sexy) demon he’d confined to that darkened cell. Also he found Light’s accusation of him being a pervert as a case of blatant hypocrisy. As L recalled he wasn’t the one who suggested tailsex or, for that matter, kept a drawer full of sex toys under lock, key, and pyrotechnic device.

“Are you going to get to it or not?”  L asked, well it was phrased like a question but it was quite obviously an order.

***

Matsuda frowned as he made his way back up to taskforce HQ. Even if Light was their prisoner he couldn’t help but feel that Ryuuzaki was treating him most unfairly.

He was stuck in that little circle all day and not even given clothes! Matsuda reasoned that that had to be violating some basic human rates—even if Light wasn’t exactly human. Matsuda’s frown deepened at the sight of L enjoying his luxury suite. The rookie glared at the weirdo detective who was sitting crouched as usual in his comfy chair and eating his fudge sundae while Light-kun was rotting in that hellhole and Matsuda couldn’t help but wonder if it was actually possible to be any more of an asshole. Matsuda also couldn’t help but wonder if L was keeping Light locked up because Light was in the doghouse regarding their relationship. But then, what did L and Light’s relationship have to do with the case? And mixing the two—wasn’t that like... bad? As Matsuda was leaving he realized that L had forgotten to ask for the key back, seeing as he was too preoccupied with his moping and his cheesecake (same thing, really). Upon feeling the weight of the key in his pocket, Matsuda made a decision, the rookie’s normally cheerful demeanor hardened into a resolute expression.

***

Light was surprised when Matsuda returned an hour later with a brown paper bag tucked under his arm and a dopey smile on his face. Light hoped that Matsuda hadn’t cooked up some well-meaning but harebrained scheme to help him escape because that was definitely not on Light’s current agenda and to do so would put Matsuda’s job in jeopardy. That mattered to Light because so far Matsuda had been the only officer who had been openly sympathetic to his plight and Light knew he could make better use of him as a police officer than unemployed.

“You shouldn’t have, Matsuda.”

Light grimaced—on the off-chance that L didn’t know what Matsuda was doing he no doubt would know in short order given that there were security cameras everywhere.

“The way they’re treating you… it’s not right! I brought you some pants…” Matsuda began but his resolution wavered a bit as he again approached the circle and he was met with the piercing twin rubies of Light’s eyes gleaming ominously in the dark of the cell assessing him with such a calculating look that it made his guts squirm. As Light took a step forward towards the edge of the circle, Matsuda’s free hand instinctively settled on the butt of his gun.

“D-don’t come any closer!”

“Woah!” Light swiftly sunk to his hands and knees, hands and wings spread wide to show he wasn’t hiding anything. “I’m not trying to escape, Matsuda. You just said you’d bring me some pants.”

For a minute Matsuda just stood there, gaping like an idiot. With his wings spread out like that everything was uncovered.

 “Er… Matsuda?”

“Huh?”

“My pants?”  Light quirked an eyebrow.

“Er… right. Here,” the suddenly red rookie stammered as he fumblingly handed him the brown paper bag. Throughout the entire transaction neither of them had been aware of how Matsuda’s polished dress shoe scuffed its way through the line of salt.

Light felt a wave of gratitude towards the cop upon inspecting the contents of the bag—it not only included a fresh pair of pants but cleaning wipes and bounty from the vending machine. Light had been stuck in here for several hours and was indeed getting a bit peckish. He had also begun to fear that he wouldn’t get fed—with the way L had been acting Light was beginning to suspect that this room was meant to be his oubliette.

“Matsuda, I could kiss you.”

The rookie cop blushed and stammered.

Could, but I won’t seeing as I am not trying to seduce you,” the teen said pointedly as he put on the pants. He would’ve asked for a shirt as well but for some reason he found he couldn’t revert to normal or retract his wings at the moment. Light suspected it had to do with the spell that had forced him here.

“You don’t need to try… and I’m not even gay!” Matsuda moaned, burying his face in his hands.

“It’s okay, Matsuda—gay, straight, bi, whatever, we’ll still love you just the way you are…”

“How touching,” L said in a bored tone, confirming that he was indeed watching. Light noted how his voice was additionally muffled and distorted through the act of obnoxiously chewing on some sweet while he spoke into the microphone and at that moment Light wondered at his own attraction towards the dorky detective.  “And here I thought you weren’t trying to seduce Matsuda.”

“As a friend,” Light insisted, voice laden with annoyance as he tried to adjust the baggy pants so they hung comfortably around his hips.

“I wasn’t sure what size you were so…”

“Its fine, Matsuda. Thank you.”

Matsuda blushed and took to staring at the demon with bedroom eyes before he caught himself again.

“Y-you’re doing it again!” Matsuda accused as he covered a nosebleed.

“Not intentionally,” Light insisted as he casually hooked a talon in and pulled the tab of the Pepsi can until it snapped open, fizzling, and the demon poured the contents down his parched throat.

Light almost choked, giggling, when he noticed the company slogan on the side of the can:

“Change The World”

Oh, the irony.

It was a testament to his boredom that he found it amusing enough to laugh about. The teenaged demon had no idea just how creepy he looked red-eyed and giggling in the dark. Or that when he stretched he had actually had taken a step outside the barrier.

The bullet tearing through his flesh was his only warning.

SONOVABITCH!!” Light roared and clutched his wounded shoulder. “Matsuda you IDIOT—

Sorry! I’m so sorry!

Matsuda had instinctively drawn his gun when he had perceived the demon prowling towards him in the dark but then his finger slipped.

The demon suppressed a growl around the jumpy officer and instead just released a put upon sigh. “Just… don’t do it again. That fucking hurts!” Light grimaced.

Matsuda peaked through his fingers of his hands, which he had covering his face as he crouched, cowering on the floor. “Y-you’re not mad?”

“Well I’d appreciate if you didn’t take to shooting me as a hobby but I suppose it didn’t hurt quite as bad as getting hit by a bus or falling off a high rise building.”

“Woah... that really… you really…”

“Yeah.” The teen sighed and brushed his chestnut-colored bangs out of his eyes. “I swear I wasn’t this accident prone before becoming a demon.”

Here the rookie gave his own strained-sounding laugh. “And here I thought I was clumsy.”

Light regarded him out of the corner of his eyes—which currently held an unmistakably homicidal glint. “Don’t push it.”

Matsuda yelped and turned an interesting shade of green as he watched how Light sunk his claws into his shoulder to dig the bullet out. The rookie squeaked in alarm when Light gripped his wrist and gently dropped the bloody slug into the palm of his hand.

“Here. Keep it.”

“Wha—? Why? What am I supposed to do with this?”

“I don’t know; I’m sure you could find some use for it. You could turn it into a lucky charm or a necklace or something. If Ryuuzaki has his way it might become quite the souvenir one day...of the sort of ‘I shot Kira and all I got was this lousy keychain’ variety.”

“You shouldn’t joke about stuff like that, Light-kun,” the rookie cautioned as he prepared to leave.

“Hey, Matsuda... If you see Ryuuzaki can you give him a message for me?"

"Can't you just tell him yourself?"

"He's not talking to me, remember? And I think that unless we can arrange something face to face... he might not be willing to listen."

"You're right. He looked pretty upset... for Ryuuzaki, I mean. He's probably not going to go for that, you know."

"Just the same, I have to try."

Matsuda lingered a moment at the door. "So what's the message?"

"Tell him I want to come clean with him… about everything.”



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